1. Pamela

    Beautiful epiphany! One which I think we caregivers can relate. I personally feel this way so much lately myself. Pulling into myself and holding it all in inside of the dark abyiss in my mind. My son, a 2.5 year survivor isn’t the problem. My job running a million dollar a year business is also not the problem. My problem is dealing with. Boyfriend who also has a traumatic brain injury. He’s one of the “hidden injury” survivors. You would never know if you didn’t know him. But he drove off of a bridge and the gearshift went into his skull. He was in a coma for 9 months. That was 15 years ago. He is a severe alcoholic. He is the only mode of stress that makes me feel like I am floating in the ocean lost. Now, I don’t blame him totally. I only think dealing with him is the thing that on top of everything else pushed me over the edge. The past 8 months we have broken up and gotten back together numerous times. He moves out and then comes back. Usually leaving when he is drunk and gets angry. Alcohol + TBI = Disaster! I love him to pieces but wonder if I am woman enough to handle 2 TBI survivors. I can’t begin to tell you how difficult it is to remember that he has a brain injury. And I truly understand his issues and his inability to control his alcohol addiction. Just feels like sometimes I am drowning and no one is going to be there to rescue me.

    • Anj Granieri

      Pamela I’m sorry to hear this. However, brain injury can explain alcohol abuse but not excuse it. Patrick is in recovery and he knows that alcohol and TBI is an absolute disaster and will cause him to regress and destroy our relationship. Your boyfriend is cognitively suffering every time he drinks. I hope he gets help and sober. And I hope you do too/ that’s a lot to take on!!!! I know, believe me

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